thatguywiththeglassesfandomcom-20200216-history
Blockbuster Buster Transcript: Honest Review: Iron Man 2
(The Channel Awesome presents logo is shown and clips from the trailer plays.) Tony Stark: Ok, give me a smooch for good luck. I might not make it back. Pepper Potts: (She kisses the Iron Man helmet and throws it off the plane.) Go get em boss. ERod (vo): God, I love that woman. Greeting fanboys and fangirls. I'm ERod and I'm the Blockbuster Buster. Let's look at the sequel to the movie that started the Marvel Madness. (The title of the movie is shown) Erod (vo): Iron Man 2 (Clips from the movie plays.) ERod (vo): Now, I'll go ahead and say it, this is my least favorite out of all the Avengers tie-in movies. I know that the success of the first Iron Man was unprecedented and that Jon Favreau was probably pressured into rushing this into production as quickly as possible. But, I still expected a little more quality. So, one again it's time for The Good, The Bad And The Ugly. The Plot ERod (vo): Irony is not without its cruelty as the very same mini-arc reactor that's keeping Tony Stark alive is now slowly killing him. In the midst of Tony searching for a new element to power the reactor and save his life, the son of a former enemy of Tony's father is out to kill Tony, using his own technology against him. The Good ERod (vo): 3 major things stops me from busting this one. The first is the villain. I remember when Mickey Rourke made his big comeback with Sin City and The Wrestler. I commented to my dad how he looked like a hulking behemoth now and that the only roles he would get are mythical beings and comic book characters. Done and done-er. And no, it doesn't bother me that he's an amalgam of two villains, Whiplash and Crimson Dynamo cause Rourke is fucking fantastic in this movie. He is so emersed in this part, that you have no dought that he is a Russian, a physicist and a former inmate. The most appealing part of his performance to me is how calm he is. We only see a real emotional outburst from him at the beginning of the movie when his father dies. The rest of the time, he's pretty damn calm. Just look at this scene. He's on his way to kill Tony on a racetrack. Racecars are zooming past him. Shit keeps exploding around him and yet, he's cool as a cucumber. When the police arrest him, he just laughs cause he made a god bleed. Which brings me to my second reason I don't bust this one. The action sequences were spectacular. If that sound petty and silly, well, this is an action movie so you have to take the action sequences into consideration. Great tension, plenty of suspense, lots of excitement but more importantly, they did a great job at re-creating the comic book feel. Especially since this is the first time you get to see superheroes fight in a movie since The Incredible Hulk Returns and that wasn't much of a fight anyway. And the last thing that stops me from busting this one is Robert Downey Jr. He is Iron Man and you can tell that he absolutely loves playing this character cause he is 100% committed to it. Tony is going through some heavy shit in this movie and its just fascinating to watch Downey portray a guy who's led a carefree lifestyle and suddenly has to deal with his mortality. And once again, the banter between him and Pepper is insanely entertaining. Pepper Potts: (She sees that Tony is going to take down of the paintings he owns and replacing it with an Iron Man poster.) Oh, no, no, no, no, no, You are not taking down the Barnet Newman and taking that up. Tony Stark: I'm not taking it down. I'm just replacing it with this. I'll see if I can - Pepper Potts: Ok, fine. ERod (vo): Also, his interactions with Sam Jackson as Nick Fury were pretty good. They played really well off of one another. I find it interesting that both Rourke and Downey are actors who experienced a really bad fall from grace and made miraculous comebacks through comic book movies making it all the more symbolic and meaningful that the two appear in a comic book movie together. The Bad ERod (vo): Most of the badness comes from sloppy or just plain old badly written plot elements like Agent Coulson being assigned as Tony's guardian until he invents a new element. Agent Coulson: I'm not here for that. I've been authorized by Director Fury to use any means necessary to keep you on premises. If you attempt to leave, or play any games I will taze you and watch Supernanny while you drool into the carpet. ERod (vo): And then, Coulson just disappears and Tony goes out and does whatever the hell he wants. Which makes the scene in which Coulson threatens him completely pointless. There's also the fact that Rhoddy justs walks into the armory and puts on the War Machine armor. Firstly, don't you need to have a mini-arc reactor in your chest to power the thing. And Tony already has one in his chest. Why would he just leave one in the armor? And thirdly, being the most dangerous weapon on Earth, why wouldn't Tony have actual contingencies to stop such a thing from happening. Even Nick Fury thinks this is retarded. Nick Fury: Whoah, whoah, whoah, he took it? You're Iron Man and he just took it? ERod (vo): Lastly, the final battle with Vanko was just way to short. It wasn't bad. It was just too short. Allright, I got to cool down besides I'm already halfway through the video. Let's look at a Stan Lee Camero! (Scene is in first-person from Tony Stark's P.O.V where he meets Larry King (played by Stan Lee). The Stan Lee Excelsior poster is shown with him saying that line and fans cheering.) The Ugly ERod (vo): In this movie, the Avengers tie-in moments are the worst. It really feels like Jon Favreau and his writing team worked out a decent story and the producers walked in with a list of extra crap they needed to shoehorn into the script to tie it into the other Marvel movies. The worst of the worst is the inclusion of the Black Widow. Now please, don't misunderstand me. I like Black Widow and Scarlett Johansson is very talented and very lovely. And while I have picked on her in the past for looking way too young to play this part, specially when she's standing next to Gwyneth Paltrow and Robert Downey Jr, seriously, it looks like they brought their neice to work. I will give Scar Jo the benefit of the doubt. After all, Avengers is being directed by Joss Whedon and if there's one thing that Joss is really good at, it's taking petite girls and turning them into believable mature badasses. But, with all that said, this doesn't stop this character from feeling tacked on. Yeah, there's that infamous scene, loaded with fan service where she fights a bunch of guys in a hallway. Allegedly, she does this to relinquish control of the War Machine armor back to Rhoddy and that's fine except for one thing. Tony Stark is in this movie! He should be able to do this on his own. Not to mention, he's the creator of the War Machine armor. If anyone should know how to override the armor systems, it should be him. But he's in the middle of a chase at the time. (He's imitating fan boy defenders when he says that "defense".) Yes, he is. But, he is the genius that built high-tech armor in a cave. I'm sure computer hacking while mid-flight is no challenge to him. And lastly, I have to talk about the super secret triangle element. Now, I'm willing to accept the extreme coincidence that the one secret message Tony's father left him just happens to be the secret formula for the very thing to save his own life. But, could they at least have the common courtesy to explain all of this. After all, the movie draws a lot of focus to Tony discovering this new element and curing himself. So, what was he missing? What was he doing wrong? What did his father know that he didn't know? Hell, I would be more then happy if they made a completely made up sci-fi explanation. But, no. He shoots a laser at the triforce and he's Iron Man again. Whoopie. One of my favorite aspects of the original movie is how detailed it was. In showing you the process of Tony becoming Iron Man. Sadly, you don't get the same courtesy here. Allright, enough dicking around. Let's look at some B.A.L.S. B.A.L.S. (Bonus Avengers Lead-in Scene) ERod (vo): Ok, out of all the B.A.L.S. in these movies, these are by far the weakest. Since this scene doesn't really tie into the Avengers movie. It pretty much says "Hey, this is the next movie we have coming out." Anyway, check it out. (Agent Coulson arrives in the middle of the New Mexico desert where there is a crater with cars around it.) Coulson: Sir, we found it. (In the center of the crater is Thor's hammer.) ERod (vo): Now, this moment may not hold as much impact now since most of us have already seen the Thor movie. But, at the time when I first saw this, they hadn't released any footage from the Thor movie yet. So, seeing Mjölnir encrusted in the ground in full live-action splender was pretty damn exiting for me. Final Verdict Erod (vo): I remember when the first Iron Man movie came out and everybody went ape-shit over allegedly seeing Captain America's shield in the background, during one scene. The fan speculation over this was so overwhelmingly annoying, that it made me appreciate the following scene all the more. Coulson: (He lifts up Captain America's shield.) What's this doing here? Tony Stark: That's it. Bring it to me. Coulson: You know what this is? Tony Stark: That's exactly what I need to make this work. Lift the coil. (Coulson does that.) Go, go. Put your knees into it. There you go and, (He puts the shield under the coil.) Perfectly level. ERod (vo): It means nothing! Absolutely nothing! It's a just a prop in the background. So, get over it. Anyway, while I thought it was a little weird they changed Justin Hammer from an old, senile business competitor to a young goofball, Sam Rockwell is so damn entertaining that I didn't care. Now, a lot of you are curious to know my opinion on the replacement of Terrence Howard with Don Cheadle and frankly, I was pretty ok with it. And I mean no disrespect to Terrence Howard but Don Cheadle is just a better actor. He's more badass and he plays a far more convincing soldier. Howard came off as more of a pushover, letting Tony walk all over him. Cheadle, on the other hand, was more like the Jim Rhodes I remember. The stern soldier that doesn't take shit from anyone. So, when he puts on the War Machine armor to fight Tony, I totally believe it. Besides, in the original Iron Man cartoon, War Machine was voiced by James Avery. So, you know they had to get a believable tough guy to live up to that level of badass-a-tude. (The badass-a-tude meter pops up.) I give this one a 5.5 and like I said, most of these points were earned by Robert Downy Jr kicking ass as Iron Man. Armor up. Category:Blockbuster Buster Transcripts Category:Transcripts Category:Content Category:Guides Category:Marvel Category:Paramount Pictures